“If I Were To Paint My Life”

If I were to paint my life, I would share with you parts of me that few have seen. I would paint my childhood. You might see a back yard with woods, with snow, and a crab apple tree. You might see a hole, where there was a septic system, where it almost claimed me. You might see a street with children and “Pat The Guy” run a stop sign on his daily excursions to buy his beer. And, how could we ever forget that haunted house, with her eyes peering through the small window! With horned rimmed glasses, watching, waiting, anticipating, so painstakingly calculating how she’ll come at you with her broom!”
—–You might see trouble waiting to absorb. Almost as if to say, “I’ve found my victims–just wait and see.” And that field of dreams with a baseball without a cover, but a ball of twisted, tightly woven string flying through the air, as we watch how we discovered power to send it soaring.

There would be confusion in this painting–and could the on-looker notice it? Would they discover that one day she was celebrating a birthday, and the next day –disappears!!! But why and how? Perhaps that’s another painting for the gallery.

Over there, in the left hand corner or in the middle, you might see the first glimmer of love, of utter amazement, of discovery and to feel that again is sweet, so sweet, you can taste it! The smell of leaves on the ground fills your senses as you study the part where love transcends. You feel your very first kiss! I look up and think so say, “don’t let a fool kiss you or a kiss fool you.”

Sometimes, I long for the innocence of youth. You move on, and where does your mind wander?

Todd Pschierer


First of all, if you are visiting this site, you may be dealing with a loss of some kind. This blog is designed to be a service to people who struggle with such loss or losses in life. There are so many unexpected occurrences  throughout our lives, but losing a child has been devastating for me and my family. You see, we lost our son Justin, age 22 to a drug overdose two years ago now, and set us off on a journey we did not expect. The heroin epidemic hit our family, and took us to this place in time. So, the journey has taken me to set up this forum to share, experience, learn, and most importantly…heal, as best we can. I hope this place offers hope, and inspiration as we move on with the journey.

Todd Pschierer